I am Woman

What does it mean to be a woman in today’s world?  The gays and Sex and the City fans heard the girls singing the song, “I am Woman,” in the movie.  That is what made me think of today’s topic.  Women are constantly faced with discrimination and the gender gap continues to exist (and grow depending on where you are).  Although America has made strides in giving woman equal opportunities, you find woman are paid less, treated as emotional or temperamental, and cannot possess male characteristics. 

As a social worker, I believe in equality for all, irrespective of race, gender, ethnicity, class, creed, among others.  I don’t care if you’re orange.  Why are women pressured to get married and produce children, be domesticated, and be subservient to men?  You may say, but you’re a man, what do you know about women’s lives.  I am a gay man, and we gays understand the traumas associated with being ostracized by others, feeling separated from the fabric of America.  These experiences are very much the same, give or take that gay men generally experience a higher level of discrimination and stigma than most people.

The point is, in a society that fashions and prides itself on equal opportunity and democracy, then why are women not perceived as equal to others, particularly men?  What makes them less capable than men?  A fascinating exhibit, The Dinner Party by Judy Chicago, http://www.brooklynmuseum.org/exhibitions/dinner_party/, at the Brooklyn Museum, commemorates important women from history.  I encourage you to visit this exhibit and learn about the women who forth for their rights and were experts in their respective fields. 

Sadly, privilege, power, and wealth are passed down from the generations. Therefore, if men possess these, it is common they pass them down to other men in the family (or other powerful and wealthy men).  Patriarchy is at the fore in this country, and regardless of how many women are employed, men lead our country.  A perfect example of our patriarchal society is when we firmly rejected Hillary Clinton in the presidential race in 2008.  Why, I ask, did she not qualify for the job?  Besides all her wheeling and dealing behind closed doors, her experience is commensurate for the job.   Don’t tell me she was unqualified.  That’s just bullshit. 

Like they sang in the movie, Sex and the City II, “I am Woman, hear me roar!” 

Judy Chicago’s The Dinner Party

Judy Chicago’s The Dinner Party

My Return from the Dead

Such a long time since I wrote anything for my blog.  Where do I even begin?  What should I write on today?  Since the last posting, there has been a lot of good news on my front.  The book proposal that I wrote with Michael Carosone, which I put blood into, will be finally published!  It is a work of creative non-fiction which will consist of several individuals who will are writing personal essays on their lives as gay Italian American men.  Themes of the essays will be on issues with discrimination, stigma, identity, Roman Catholicism, family, father-son conflicts, masculinity, among others.

In my opinion, there is nothing more powerful than the personal narrative.  How could you deny someone their experience? We are amalgamations of various experiences and identities. I have had many encounters with all the issues presented in the book, which were both painful and uplifting.  The power of resiliency is what kept me going–and still to this very day, the motivating force in my life are these experiences.  In an effort to advertise the advent of this book, we’ll be presenting at conferences with a panel of book contributors.  We are seeking to march in the 2012 New York City Pride March with our fellow gay Italian Americans.

Aside from the book, I recently attended the Human Rights Campaign’s (HRC) New York City Gala, which was held at the Waldolf Astoria on Saturday, February 4, 2012.  That was simply one of the most phenomenal nights of my life.  I was in the presence of many elite individuals, including various politicians, professionals, and activists.  At first, it was quite intimidating to be in their presence, but after re-considering these nerves, I became more comfortable and had very interesting conversations.  One conversation surrounded the AIDS epidemic in New York City during the 80s and 90s.  Although I was a child at the time of the 80s (and a precocious one), there was a certain feeling in the air.  With many gay men having passed from this terrible disease, industries were impacted adversely.

If you  are a gay man and don’t know about this pivotal time in our gay history, please read the play, The Normal Heart, by Larry Kramer, or Borrowed Time, by Paul Monette.  Reading stories of this nature will transform you forever.  The thought of losing loved ones to AIDS is unfathomable–but it happened, and still HIV/AIDS continues on.  Ironically enough, Sonya Morgan, from the Housewives of New York City, approached me at the gala; she was in a drunken state and began making declarative statements on how AIDS is over. (She is probably the only person who I detested)  Of course, a fellow gay and I started to educate this moron.  She was a mess.  I told her manager to go get her some water already.  Sadly, with her “fame,” she is telling the public lies about this epidemic.  Can someone please escort her out next time?

I included photos from the gala.  Please click on the links to the right side of this Website.  More news to come.

HRC NYC Gala, Feb. 4, 2012

HRC NYC Gala, Feb. 4, 2012

HRC NYC Gala, Feb. 4, 2012

HRC NYC Gala, Feb. 4, 2012

HRC NYC Gala, Feb. 4, 2012

What Are You Thankful For?

Once again, I have lapsed from writing a blog due to other stuff taking priority.  For the last two months, I have been studying for the GRE which I am taking soon.  During this time, I thought about whether or not a doctorate is an aspiration of mine.  I would much rather be completely certain than begin a doctoral program having doubts.  Well, after much self-reflection, I know this is definitely a path for me.  I love to learn which bolsters the role of an academic.  And I love to teach.  Those who say the classroom experience has been negative probably had a teacher who was not enthusiastic about teaching.

My ability to read, write, and think is something I am thankful for, but the love and support of my partner, family, and friends ranks the highest.  Without them, I would be nowhere.  Also on this list is the ability to be compassionate–which is lacking in our society.  More people appear satisfied with money and greed, and they are impervious to their surroundings.

Although, today I am staying in my own apartment to study, my family and friends know how much I care about them.  Even through all the issues, we are close.

So, the question for you today is, What are you thankful for?

Too Much Time Away

You have seen many photos posted on this blog, but no rants–just raves. Thus, I am missing my rants; I love to be opinionated and wail and be dramatic about issues. There has been much on my mind, but sometimes I choose not to share these thoughts because of fears of criticism. Sometimes I have too much to say about the ills of our current world. I obsess, ruminate, and dwell on the ills and the problems, and ultimately thinking nothing will change. Deep down inside I still have hope to effect change and for the decency of this human civilization. Inside I am pained, plagued, tormented, and troubled; I am crying for this world to become discerning and empathic, and to stop being insular and judgmental.

As I evolve and develop stronger relationships with people, I accept the various tiers that each person possess in my life. Some more intimate than others, but either way they enlighten the world that I live in. They listen, care, acknowledge, and validate. I am aware that these people by choice want to care and they make great impact on me.

There are several agendas on my plate, whichever is meant to pan out will. Maybe all of them, maybe none of them. Either way, none of that matters. The love that I feel day in and day out is what matters. Materials, objects, money, and ownership don’t go with you to the graveyard. The interaction you had with others is what you will always carry with you.

If you are removed from your social environment, re-connect, take risks, and travel into another person’s universe. Be with him/her in the here-and-now, not in your social media world.

Hope you enjoyed my philosophical journey.